Estrellita, and the importance of hardware

Quick post - then off for some debauchery.

Ed's got game - he's got game like Rico Suave. Like JFK. (And JFK Jr. too!) Like Wilt Chamberlain. Like Bill Clinton. Like Cyrano de Bergerac. You get the point - no need to explain further.


Turns out this "Jessica" girl wasn't totally forthcoming.

Sure - they hit it off. They had fun at the bar. They had fun eating their double-webb's at 2:30. They even had fun at her place shortly after said double-webb's. But that's where it gets kinda sketchy.

(Mind you - all of this is being reported third-hand by me, so if I screw up some details, or mess up the timeline - don't bitch about it.)

ANYway - Ed and Jessica get back to her place and they "talk." they talk about their families, their wants, their needs, etc, etc, etc... From what it sounds like, it's going pretty well.

She gets off the futon, saunters over to the HiFi, and puts in a little Esquivel. Estrillita, I believe. The lights are dimmed, the candles are lit, and Ed's thinking that it's time to get his freak on. (HIS words - not mine)

Jessica comes back, sits down, and gives Ed "that look." Ed - being the "playa" that he is, pulls a Hitchesque move, and moves toward her the suggested 90%. She moves in the 10, and their lips touch.

I know what you're thinking - Score one for the old guy! (wait - it gets better)

Within the first half second of the kiss, her front door flies open. The frat boy from karaoke comes barging in. As it turns out, Toby (I swear - that's his name) is Jessica's fianceé. First, Toby is upstaged by my man Ed at karaoke, and now, Ed is fixing to knock boots with his woman. Not a good scene.

Toby is irate, Ed is confused, and Jessica is LOVING it.

Toby starts screaming at Ed - She's my fianceé, we're getting married, she knows my Mom, blahdy blahdy blah blah..

Ed's all like, "Dude. No ring. WTF?"

With that simple statement, Jessica flies off the handle.

"Yeah loser. No ring! I told you to get a job, save your money, get credit - but Noooooo!"

(Anyone who's been in a relationship with a woman knows what "But Noooooo" sounds like.)

The whole argument then switches from Toby and Ed, to Toby and Jessica.

Ed slid out the door, lost Jessica's address, number, and general description.

I may have to resign my wingman duties.